A Belated Happy Thanksgiving

I just wanted to wish you all a belated Happy Thanksgiving.  I hope you enjoyed the love and fellowship of family and friends or even pleasant solitude and peace.  I enjoyed them all. I ran across a post on a site that I frequently visit, Blogging Baby, and the question posed was Should Teachers Show A Truthful Thanksgiving? My response was:            “I have never lied to my older students regarding our country’s past treatment of Native Americans or other “minorities”. That would be unfair to me (being that I am a member of a “minority” group)and my students. And while I have never lied to my younger students (I taught elementary grades as well) I never dwelled on the negative aspects of this country’s past. I would say things like, “The pilgrims weren’t always kind to Native Americans, however . . .” Children should be children, but never deny the truth. The truth should be told and there are age appropriate ways to explain it.” 

I’m sure the topic has come up before.  Perhaps it comes up in many homes, schools, etc. each year.  I just don’t think that I’ve ever really attention to or given it much thought until now.   Despite this country’s past, despite what has been done, what continues to be done or what will be done, I am grateful that I am a citizen and that there is a national holiday that gives us all an opportunity to reflect and give thanks for who we are and for who and what we have in our lives.  I truly believe that Thanksgiving is a day that can be celebrated by all regardless of nationality or religious affiliation.  I believe that it can be celebrated alone or with a group of people.   I‘ve heard people state, “I give thanks and show my gratitude all year round.”  Others have said, “Just like Valentine’s Day, Thanksgiving is just another economic gimmick.  Why limit your love and gratitude to just one day?”  While all of those comments are justified and may even be true, many of us, due to the frenetic pace of our lives, don’t take the time to sit down and have a meal with our family and friends, let alone stop and reflect on just how grateful we are to have them in our lives. 

I am thankful for Dr. Man, my wonderful mate, both of our families, our friends, our jobs, my cat and the kind people that I’ve met here in the “blogosphere.” 

Happy Belated Thanksgiving to you all.

Your Responses to “Threatened”

I just want to say thank you to all of you who responded to my post about me being threatened by one of my students.  I’ve heard from fellow educators and parents/guardians and I truly appreciate your concern.  I haven’t been able to respond to you like I really wanted due to the dreaded report card time.  I am in the midst of getting out grades before the Thanksgiving holiday, while waiting for some sort of resolution to the incident in which I was threatened. 

As for a quick update, said student went to court on Tuesday, the day after I was threatened for an incident involving her attacking a police officer.  Later that day, the Director of Education (DoE) addressed the staff during a meeting and stated that she had been hearing, from students, that staff members were escalating situations in their classrooms. She went on the “remind” us that our students are emotionally disturbed and that we as professionals needed to watch what we say and should not “act like we are emotionally disturbed too.” I was livid to say the least.  Another staff member asked her if she was talking to teachers to hear their sides of these issues.  She said, “Yes, I’m hearing this from staff.”

So, I approached the DoE after the meeting and asked was her comments were directed towards me due to what I stated to my student.  She paused, took a deep breath and said, “No, it wasn’t directed just at you but . . .” Yeah right!  She went on to state that she had heard from the principal that I admitted to telling the girl that I would stab her back if she stabbed me.  I told her that I told the girl (and later told the principal) that if she stabbed me, I would protect myself and could do the same.  To me, that indicated that her comments really were aimed at me.  I then held up my small wrist as I was talking and said, “Look at me.  I’m not physically intimidating.  The truth is, that girl could beat the shit out of me if she wanted and I believe that she is very capable of doing so.  She attacked a cop for crying out loud!”  I’m barely 5′2″ and 120 pounds bloated and in wet clothes.  This girl has gone after grown men, much larger than her.  Do you think I scare her?  Seriously, what do you think she would do me in a rage?

To add insult to it all, when I asked the DoE if she had read my report (which she had requested on Monday afternoon after I had already left for the day) to get my side of the story, guess what she said, ”No.”  She was so busy that she hadn’t had time!  I went on to state to her that I no longer want the student in my classroom.  Her response?  “Well, I can’t guarantee that.” 

In the meantime, the student has not yet returned to school, but her boyfriend says that she will.  Her counselor, the licensed pyschologist supervising her counselor and the A.P. have all stated that they don’t believe that the school where I teach is the right place for her. 

Is it just me or do the administrators at school where I work, not value the safety of their teachers?   What would you do in this situation?

Threatened

A student of mine threatened to stab me with a pencil on Monday.   All of this occurred when I asked her to hand over her pencil prior to leaving the classroom to use the restroom.  (This is a school policy due to incidents of graffiti and gang “tagging” on walls and other surfaces). 

Now, I’ve been threatened before, and haven’t reacted to all of those threats in the same manner as I reacted to this most recent one.  However, I took this threat very seriously because said student has a history of assaulting staff members.  It once took six, adult men to restrain this girl.  That’s right, said student is female.  What’s really amazing is that she’s not a burly, Big Bertha kind of girl.  She couldn’t be taller than 5′6″ and although she is what I would call “thick,” she weighs less than 200 pounds.  What amazed me even more is that she had the audacity to attack a cop!  In my line of work, I know I should not have been shocked, but once again, given that she doesn’t have any gang ties, I was.

Anyway, this kid has a long history of getting into trouble.  She wasn’t in school today in part due to her threats against me, but she also had to go to court.  For attacking the cop.  Or was it for attacking her former bus driver?  I can’t remember.  So, after hurling and endless stream of personal attacks (my looks), cursing me out and calling me every name in the book and then some, threatening to throw a bottle of apple juice at me, when she stated, “I should stab you with this pencil,” I snapped back by saying “And if I have to defend myself I could do the same thing.”  Said student then yelled, “Yeah, and I’ll spit in your face.”  I walked out of the room to get another staff member to escort her out of my classroom.  For a while she refused.  She paced the room before sitting on top of her desk.  Then she began to bang her bottle of apple juice, which was now almost empty, on her desk.  She loudly stated, to a male staff member and the rest of class, “I gotta go to court tomorrow.  Ooh, she better be glad that I gotta go to court tomorrow.  Or else I would have hit the bitch!”  When I went to get the Assistant Principal, who is also supposed to be in charge of discipline, his comment to me was, “Well isn’t X (the male staff member) in there?”  I told him that yes, X was with the problem student, however she was refusing to leave the room.  The A.P. reluctantly got up up from is desk and slowly walked towards my classroom.  After spending several more  minutes talking to this child she agreed to leave the room.  The A.P. walked out thinking that she was going to follow him, but low and behold she didn’t.  The other male staff member remained, trying to get her to leave.  A minute or two later and she finally left.  But not before promising to “get” me on Wednesday and do what she did to another teacher on campus.  It has been said that she physically attacked him, however I don’t know the details of that incident.  Her in-school counselor down to the A.P. have all stated that she does not belong at our school.  It is not the right place for her.  I think a mental institution or jail would be fitting.

Anyhow, I e-mailed the Principal and the Director of Education to inquire about the school’s policy regarding student threats against teachers.  Both were in meetings all day, but as soon as the DoE heard, she responded.  I have yet to hear from the Principal.  The DoE called and spoke with girl and her foster mother.  I don’t know what all the girl said, but in a string of e-mails that was sent out by the DoE, she supposedly told the girl that even if she feels that staff has acted inappropriately with her, either verbally or physically, she shouldn’t take matters into her own hands.  Now, although she expressed concern regarding my feelings and well being when she saw me this morning, I wondered what did said student say to her.  This girl also has a history of lying and contorting the facts.  So when the DoE requested a detailed report first thing this morning ( I didn’t receive her message until this morning and it took me all day to write the report, plus another), I felt put on the defensive.  How would you have taken that and what would you have done?  I’m talking about the threats all the way through to the request for a detailed report.  Was I/ Am I being overly sensitive.  Did I react inappropriately?

I’m seriously fed up.  With several of the staff members and most of the students.  For most of the kids at my school, it’s the last stop before a detention center or camp of some sort and depending on their age, jail.  Can kids like this be saved?  Is there hope for them?  I mean at this stage in the game can they truly be reformed?  Some days I think it’s possible.  But, lately, I’ve been questioning this more than ever before.  All I really hear them express interest in is weed (pot), gangs, music, sex and running the streets.  Comment.  Please.

A Lovely Day

Before leaving school yesterday, I decided, on a whim, to make a phone call home to an exhausted grandmother who is not only raising her granddaughter, but is also caring for her elderly mother all while she herself is partially disabled.  Now, I’ve called this woman many times before.  In fact, as recently as last week (and the week before), I was calling this woman everyday to have someone come and pick up her rude and defiant grandchild. This student had not always been that way.  Sure, we had the usual few weeks “honeymoon” period when she first arrived at the school, but then she began a swift, downward spiral into rumored drug use (I say rumored because staff never found out if it was indeed true) and confusion regarding her sexual orientation (that’s a whole other post). But, somewhere between last Friday and Sunday something just short of miraculous occurred.  

On Monday, I was expecting for said student to come in and refuse to do anything but eat and sleep and curse and complain in between eating and sleeping.  I expected to have to call her grandmother to come and get her or send someone for her, before the morning was even over.  But nothing happened.  To my surprise she came in and did as I asked.  She had a few problems with other teachers throughout the day and refused to participate in P.E., but she got through it.  On Tuesday, she had what we call a “perfect day.” I lavished praise on her, told her that this was the girl I once knew and told her to keep it up.  Same thing happened on Wednesday.  She even wrote an essay and typed it up – something she wouldn’t have done the week before.  So yesterday, after re-arranging books, organizing folders of schoolwork, after wiping down and straightening rows of desks, before shutting down my computer and walking out the door, I glanced at said student’s desk and then picked up the phone.  The phone call went something like this:

Me: Hi, Ms. Grandmother?

The Grandmother: Yes.

Me: This is Ms. School Teacher, from Wonderful School, X’s teacher? (like she doesn’t know who I am)

The Grandmother: Oh yes.

Me: Well, I’m calling because I wanted to report something good for a change.  I know I’m always calling you to tell you about all the bad things that X does, but I wanted to let you know that she’s had a very good week.

The Grandmother: (sounding relieved) Oh, that’s good!  Oh, thank you, thank you.  You know she’s been doing better at home too.

Me: Well that’s good to hear.  She’s done well in basically all of her classes this week and completed her work, and it sounds to me that her behavior at home and at school has gone hand-in-hand.

The Grandmother: Yes.

Me: Well, let’s keep praising her for it.  I gave her a hug and told her that I was proud of her. Hopefully it will continue.

The Grandmother: Hopefully.

Me: Well, take care and enjoy your weekend.

The Grandmother: Oh I will and you too!

Me: (smiling and slightly laughing) Thank you.  Goodbye.

I shut down my computer, grabbed my bags, turned off the lights and walked out the door.  I looked up; the sun was beaming down on me and walked to my car.  I felt good!  I had just delivered good news, the sun was out and most of all, I wouldn’t have to come into work the next day.  As Bill Withers sang, “Then I look at you and the world’s alright with me.  Just one look at you and I know it’s gonna be – a lovely day.  Lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, a love-ly day . . .”   

Note: The grandmother didn’t say a whole lot because her English is limited.

Alcohol and Red Bull (and Possibly Weed)

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On the same note, I overheard another group of kids talking about drinking and combing alcoholic drinks with energy drinks such as Red Bull.  Has anyone else ever heard of this? 

MNBC featured an article earlier last week on kids getting buzzed on energy drinks.  But some of the kids at my school seem to be taking this to another level.  They drink and some have openly spoken about using marijuana.

Drunk, high, wide-eyed and full of energy.  What a combination.  What next? 

Check out the article: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15403552/